Of Flutters and Flowers
by Pale Treasures
Summary: Jane's thoughts in the garden, during the badminton game. 2011 movie verse. One shot.


**Disclaimer: **The characters and story will forever be Charlotte Brontë's property.

**Rating: **K+

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**Of Flutters and Flowers**

It was a spring day the likes of which, in its sunlight tinted with rose hues and delicious shadow, spilling into lacy shapes and beckoning the passerby to sit beneath it, I had never seen. It was a spring day which caused the flowers to push from the earth with greater vigour and open themselves to the caress of the glorious sun. Flowers that clustered in neat flower beds and hung in fragrant bunches from tree branches hardened by Primavera's return. They glowed in the sun, some in pale and delicate colours, as though one could find them in a fairy garden; others of vibrant and brilliant tints, exotic to the eye and mind, the prized possession of a sultan or an Oriental prince.

Adèle and I were seizing the sunny day to play badminton in the garden; my little pupil was new to the game and her poor skill – little surpassed by mine – caused us to halt the game many times, as she retrieved the shuttlecock with a giggle or moaned in good-natured chagrin as she failed to properly strike it. I, it must be owned, was only half paying attention to the game. The weather was so fine and promising, clearing away the doubts and gloom of a long, pale winter, and I experienced such secret well-being in the depths of my breast that I regarded the constant interruptions with good-natured patience. My good mood being thus admitted, I would not proceed to lie to myself as to its cause.

Mr. Rochester stood nearby, aiding some of his men with the garden. I heard their deep voices ring comfortingly in the warm air, carried over to me in disjointed fragments. I little cared what they talked about, however; his presence was enough to delight me to the very core of my soul. He gave no signs of noticing I was nearby, but something in my heart thrilled joyously, convinced, I little knew how, of the opposite.

Adèle giggled and uttered something I did not hear, as she rushed over to where I was to pick up the shuttlecock once more. I felt a deep swell of tenderness for her which was not, however, related to Adèle alone. My egotistical heart, entirely encased in hope for perhaps the first time in my short years, sang for a different reason. But oh, how delicious it was to permit it to yield to egotism! What a novel and wondrous thing, to feel that the world smiled benignly on myself for once, and extended its promises and joys to me!

It was easy to feel that all was right in the world, and that you could love all who occupied it, when you were in such a hopeful and blissful mood as mine. It was easy to feel that the sufferings and hardships of the past had melted into nothingness, or were but a falsehood conjured up by a feverish, depressed brain, with never a speck of truth to them. How could one not believe in future, lasting happiness on a day like this, with the whisper of mutual attraction coursing through the sun-filled air in silence, but piercing the flesh with a promising thrill? How could _I_ not believe it?

I heard Mr. Rochester's voice once more, deeper than the rest, issuing what dimly sounded like a command; with a smile for Adèle's antics but which did not leave my lips, I turned my head to look at him. He was carrying a heavy vase of flowers, not without effort, making for moving it elsewhere. My smile widened, almost beyond any effort of mine to restrain it. But, then, I did not wish to attempt it.

To believe that, from this day onward, there was the possibility of similar days to come, filled my breast with peace; what once in me had burnt barren and yearning, was now cooled by sweet, refreshing rain. My blood had sung with such instinctive certainty, my heart had pulsed with such warm purpose, I could not rebuke myself into prudence or dispelling such moments as lies – the misunderstandings of a young, infatuated mind, too drunk on the elixir of life and love to regard its surroundings coolly.

As I lay my head on my pillow that night, I felt tranquil and easy in both mind and body. And – it must be said – I could not help thinking it – that at last I was privy to the kind of ecstasy I had only dreamt of until then.

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**When I first watched the movie, I found this scene so enchanting and filled with unspoken, subtle meaning; since last year I've wanted to write something about it, but have lacked the inspiration to do so, and even now I don't think my words can do justice to either the scene itself or my feelings as I watched it. Hopefully they're well expressed in this story, and able to make you feel at least a little of what I experienced myself.**


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